After quitting the presidential race yesterday, former Republican candidate for president Fred Thompson landed on his feet by signing on to star in a Golden Girls reunion movie.
"I always admire the work those young gals did, and was hoping to work with them before I shipped out for the glue factory," Thompson said.
Thompson suggested a storyline with a romance with one of the girls, but the producers thought that since they were so much younger than him, it would not be credible.
Instead, Thompson will star as a senile old man who can't remember who he is who is left on the Golden Girls porch.
Despite his central role in the TV movie, Thompson had few lines to learn. "Since my character is supposed to be senile, they figured it would be easier for me to just sort of respond to what the characters are saying and if I get confused, so much the better."
When the girls start to investigate his identity, they find that he is a former actor, lobbyist, and senator whose young trophy wife convinced him to run for president. When she realized he had no chance of winning, she left him on the Golden Girls porch.
"I don't know where these writer get their ideas," Thompson said. "I can't imagine anything like this happening in real life."
Thompson's wife could not be reached for comment as her cell phone number is no longer working and she has moved without leaving a forwarding address.